meet me or not, i'm out of control
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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