i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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