My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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