I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
