her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize