Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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