someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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