All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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