Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I want to fling myself into the sun
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
