Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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