Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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