it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
