Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
