Fuck appropriateness.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
