What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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