Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
