it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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