I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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