Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
