Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize