Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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