She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
