You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
