3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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