when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize