oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Buhtt sex?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
