16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Holy sore nipples Batman