I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
