I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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