yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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