So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
