So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
My breasts were aching with rage.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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