Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
