Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
