How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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