If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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