3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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