I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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