It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
