Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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