PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize