hell yes lets make some ravioli
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
