what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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