I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
