it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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