Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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