There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
