playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
