So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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