ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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